Sorry, not funny but, thus bothered me....
Across town, we had a little boy wander from his home in the middle of the night this week. The whole town searched for an hour in the morning, and they found him a couple blocks away, laying near some woods. They don't know what happened, and, thank God, so far it doesn't look like anybody did anything. The whole town stood by each other, and the poor family. I was so proud of the community, that, Lee Greenwood, I've taken some liberties and changed the words to your song "Proud to be an American", and shared it on the community web pag.
If tomorrow
someone asked me,
What I thought of
where I live.
Haddon Township's
Full of people,
With extra love and
Hope to give.
I'd thank my luck stars,
to be living here today,
Cause the town all got together
In the most amazing way.
And I'm proud to live
in my home town,
Cause when that
Young boy died.
We stood together,
Hand in hand and
wiped our tears,
we cried.
And I'd gladly stand up
Next to you,
A stranger,
Hold on tight.
Cause there ain't no doubt
This tragedy,
Changed us overnight
From Graisbury,
To Cuthbert,
To Haddon Avenue.
From Greenman road,
To South Park Drive
Locust avenue.
Newton Creek too,
Across the Pike,
To Berwick,
Yeah, it's true.
Where there's pride
In every one of our hearts,
And it's time to stand and say
That Haddon Township
Though it's huge,
This nightmare
Made us tight.
We gathered
In a group for him,
To burn the candle lights,
Those who couldn't be there,
Well they,
made their feelings known,
On every doorstep round the town,
Lights and candles shone.
And I'm proud to live
in my home town,
Cause when that
Young boy died,
We stood together,
Hand in hand and
wiped our tears,
we cried.
And I'd gladly stand up
Next to you,
A stranger
Hugging me,
We sent that angel
on his way,
God bless that family.
Thursday, October 15, 2015
Sunday, October 4, 2015
Senior citizens have sex too, you know!
My mom called
County Social Services
for Senior Citizens
asking them to send
me any info they could,
to help me with my 95
year old cousin, Betty.
I got a huge envelope,
filled with phone numbers,
a brochure, and presents;
a deck of cards, tape measure,
jar opener, pill box,
and a diaphragm.
A diaphragm. Huh.
I have heard that sex
is running rampant
in nursing homes.
But pregnancy surely
isn't a problem.
And a diaphragm
doesn't protect
against STDS
which I know is the
problem.
So I sat there
looking at it.
Trying to imagine
that conversation.
"Here Betty, here's your
diaphragm. You know,
so your 95 year old eggs
don't get you pregnant.
"But, Betty, you still
have to use protection,
so you don't get an STD.
Oh, a sexually transmitted disease.
It means you "caught" it from someone.
No. not a cold.
You get it because you didn't,
you know, "protect" yourself.
No, not because you didn't wear
warm clothes.
Because the guy didn't
wear protection.
No, not a hat and mittens.
Protection against
a sexually transmitted disease.
No, not the measles.
Not chicken pox either.
Look, here's a deck of cards.
Have your friends over
and keep busy doing that
instead."
I finally picked the "diaphragm" up.
And flipped it over.
And on the back it said:
"Medicine bottle opener
Place rubber ring over
top of medicine bottle and
pull. Lid will come off easily".
County Social Services
for Senior Citizens
asking them to send
me any info they could,
to help me with my 95
year old cousin, Betty.
I got a huge envelope,
filled with phone numbers,
a brochure, and presents;
a deck of cards, tape measure,
jar opener, pill box,
and a diaphragm.
A diaphragm. Huh.
I have heard that sex
is running rampant
in nursing homes.
But pregnancy surely
isn't a problem.
And a diaphragm
doesn't protect
against STDS
which I know is the
problem.
So I sat there
looking at it.
Trying to imagine
that conversation.
"Here Betty, here's your
diaphragm. You know,
so your 95 year old eggs
don't get you pregnant.
"But, Betty, you still
have to use protection,
so you don't get an STD.
Oh, a sexually transmitted disease.
It means you "caught" it from someone.
No. not a cold.
You get it because you didn't,
you know, "protect" yourself.
No, not because you didn't wear
warm clothes.
Because the guy didn't
wear protection.
No, not a hat and mittens.
Protection against
a sexually transmitted disease.
No, not the measles.
Not chicken pox either.
Look, here's a deck of cards.
Have your friends over
and keep busy doing that
instead."
I finally picked the "diaphragm" up.
And flipped it over.
And on the back it said:
"Medicine bottle opener
Place rubber ring over
top of medicine bottle and
pull. Lid will come off easily".
Thursday, October 1, 2015
Amazing Grace? Who saved a wretch like her?
I did nothing but complain
about the Pope visit.
Because it was disrupting our lives
Papal - roads closed
Papal - on the news
Papal papal papal
Then Saturday came
And I watched every bit of it
From the moment Shepherd One
Touched down in Philly
Till it took off for Rome
Every bit of it
Except for Aretha
That horror show
I'm embarrassed
That she walked out and
Didn't acknowledge
the Pope
And started singing
a song
One of THE most holy
Songs of all
And RUINED IT
In the papers
It was written like this:
"infamous, dramatic soulful pauses
before stirring up some holy spirit
and dancing her way off stage."
She's arrogant
And snotty
But not uppity
Because I just found out
that "uppity" is racist
Even though it has
the same definition
Regardless
She's a pompous ass
She may not be Catholic
And she may not believe
In what the Pope preaches
But she was there to sing
FOR HIM
she should have at least turned
And nodded
And maybe sang a song
That was recognizable
And not a dichotomy
Because, Aretha
You were definitely a wretch
And you were anything
But graceful
about the Pope visit.
Because it was disrupting our lives
Papal - roads closed
Papal - on the news
Papal papal papal
Then Saturday came
And I watched every bit of it
From the moment Shepherd One
Touched down in Philly
Till it took off for Rome
Every bit of it
Except for Aretha
That horror show
I'm embarrassed
That she walked out and
Didn't acknowledge
the Pope
And started singing
a song
One of THE most holy
Songs of all
And RUINED IT
In the papers
It was written like this:
"infamous, dramatic soulful pauses
before stirring up some holy spirit
and dancing her way off stage."
She's arrogant
And snotty
But not uppity
Because I just found out
that "uppity" is racist
Even though it has
the same definition
Regardless
She's a pompous ass
She may not be Catholic
And she may not believe
In what the Pope preaches
But she was there to sing
FOR HIM
she should have at least turned
And nodded
And maybe sang a song
That was recognizable
And not a dichotomy
Because, Aretha
You were definitely a wretch
And you were anything
But graceful
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